TrueVisions, the monopoly provider of satellite television, is a pretty dire operation. Endless repeats of ancient episodes of imported programmes such as ER and Martha lack mental stimulation. However, TrueVisions does make some of its own content. I thought that things were at a low point when they started broadcasting the contents of a panda’s cage twenty four hours a day, every day of the week. However, I recently discovered that there’s another 24 hour channel which films the inside of a coffee shop. Yes, all the thrills of watching people make and drink coffee.

In fact, this exercise in inane television, is a reality game show. Each week one of the contestants will be voted off by the viewers (if there are any) submitting a text message with their vote. The prize is to run a coffee shop for a year. Amazingly, this is the second series.

British TV viewers can look forward to the return of Big Brother to their living room. It seems that Britain’s most famous pornographer is poised to sign the deal for a further series to be broadcast on his Red Hot TV Channel 5. Big Brother was also made in Thailand, but it seems the format was too exciting for TrueVisions’ viewers, and the programme was pulled after the second series a few years ago.

Coming next, a thrilling, 24 hour reality series … Watching Paint Dry.

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