master was gardening this morningWhisky Portrait
i was rather annoyed
gardening is my hobby
not his
i tried to help though
i grabbed the weeds
he d pulled up
and bits of hedge
he d chopped off
and ran to the other side
of the garden with them
he so appreciated my help
that he swept up all the dead leaves
into a pile
so i could roll around
on my back on them

master didn t spend very long gardening
he never does
he says it s too hot
some people say
if you can t stand the heat
stay out of the kitchen
well i say if
you can t stand the heat
stay out of my garden

and thinking of kitchens
i don t know why my master
keeps the kitchen door shut
the work surfaces won t
lick themselves you know
and if i don t lick them
who will

as an artist
i always push myself creatively
some lesser artists
have stuck to the same medium
throughout their career
van goch did nothing but
daub oil paint on canvas
for his entire career
bernini just chipped away
at blocks of marble
i however have advanced
from paper towels to newspaper
look at my latest work
it produces a profound emotional response
in all who see it
master was almost reduced to tears

Whisky Newspaper Art

rarely has the world seen a talent like mine



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