i was right thatWhisky Portrait
the pyramid of mechanical frogs
was really dangerous
master was watching a documentary
about a medic who
works for the world health organisation
anyway in it
a pyramid of mechanical frogs
bursts through the wall
and attacks the medics


apparently the proper name
for a pyramid of mechanical frogs
is a christmas tree
and frogs make a lot of them
at this time of year
be on your guard

it s been a difficult week for me
a few days ago
i was taking my master out
for our regular preprandial drag

master s way too old and slow
to keep up with me

and i saw what my master calls
the ugly dog
on the opposite side of the road
normally i just keep walking
and he ignores me
this time he ran across the road
and attacked
it can t be anything i barked
i didn t say a thing
he s bigger than me
and older
i think he must envy
my youthful good looks
anyway some workmen came
and one threw his sandals
at the ugly dog and
ugly dog backed off
which was a pity because
i was about to use
one of my killer moves
that i use to deal with frogs
fortunately yours truly
wasn t badly hurt
just a small cut on my nose

i was in the kitchen
watching master shred a
breast of chicken poached
in coconut cream
when he dropped half of it
on the floor
right in front of me
i thought it a little odd
since i d already had my whiskyfood
however it would have been rude
not to wolf it down
and it was delicious
unfortunately it wasn t meant for me
master had dropped it by accident
because it was very slippery
he was very cross
now i m banned from the kitchen
so i just sit at the threshold
watching master make food
putting on my most doleful expression
if only i d been born a bloodhound
i could do a much better job

master tells me that he s
going away to india
in a couple of days
so i ll probably be too busy
to write again soon
so i ll wish you all now
a merry christmas
and a happy new year



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